A Real Life Miracle...


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By buckeye in georgia on 16:22:05 01/17/09

As promised, here is the story...

The first week of February, 1995, my wife calls me at my office to tell me that she is pregnant. No big deal, we've done this four times already. I'm delighted and looking forward to the new addition.

My wife goes to her OB/GYN for confirmation and gets the routine schedule of events. Her doctor was her mom's doctor, my mom's doctor, all of my SIL's doctor, etc. Before he retired he delivered more than 20 babies that have my last name. A great guy.

Anyhow, my wife's doc calls her into his office following her first ultrasound. My wife goes and comes home crying. The pictures show a severe spinal defect. The doctor, a Catholic, tells my wife that abortion is an option. He won't do it, but it is an option. He asks to see me and my wife together the next week. I go in and talk with him. He pretty much puts it on the line for me...baby has Spina Bifida, which won't kill her. However, she is also suffering from severe hydrocephalus. Her head is full of spinal fluid that can't drain due to the defect. The fluid is taking up massive amounts of space which will prevent her brain from developing. Worse, the brain that is developed is being pushed unmercifully into her brain stem. Obviously, this is bad.

I ask the doctor how many times the neurologist has been wrong? How many times has he made a mistake? His answer was never.

So, here we are. We've got a baby that isn't going to be able to breathe on her own due to damage to the brain stem. If she does live, her brain will be so underdeveloped that she will be blind, deaf, and retarded. Abortion is an option, but we have been blessed with four healthy children and we are Catholic. So, it really isn't an option for us. I decide that I'll get things figured out.

I take my daughters chart to my family physician. The man is a miracle worker...he kept me Scotch taped and bandaided together for my entire football career. I never missed a practice. He'll know what to do. The man sat in front of me and cried. He basically told me that I had to figure out how I define life. This baby may live, but she would never "live". He talked about the impact on the rest of my family and the amount of time and effort that would be required to care for Allison. This doctor is an Italian Catholic that told me he himself would likely choose abortion.

Next, I went to the funeral home. They were family and they helped me make arrangements. However, they refused payment. They told me to wait.

My wife and I had many discussions over the next six months. The one thing that we absolutely agreed on was natural child birth. The doctors told us that a c-section wouldn't make a difference so we agreed that, unless medically impossible, we would go natural and let nature take its course. No sense in putting my wife, with four other babies, at any greater risk.

My wife carried that baby, with this knowledge, for six months. Obviously, we weren't excited like we were with the first four. I spent most of that time trying to prepare her for the inevitable. The whole time, no joke, she kept a positive attitude. Somehow, some way, everybody was wrong.

On 9/27 (due date) my wife went to the doctor. The ultrasound that day measured the baby's head at 10.7 cm - too big for natural childbirth. Also, labor hadn't started yet and didn't seem close. The doctor told my wife he'd "see her next week." My wife came home in tears that day. She told me that she couldn't do this anymore and that she just wanted to get it over with. I called her doctor and told him she had had enough, please, let's just do this. He told me to bring her to the Hospital at 0700 on 9/29.

When we got to the hospital on that day, my wife was sent immediately for an ultrasound. We learned at that time that the baby's head had shrunk back to 9.3 cm. It didn't matter. My wife, on her own, told me and everybody else that she was having a c-section. In our private time together I reminded her about all we had agreed on and that she has four babies at home and she shouldn't put any undo stress on herself if the result would be the same. For the first time in my married life, she trumped my ass. She told me that this was her baby, her body, and she knew what was best. It didn't matter what I said...she was doing her thing.

Twelve hours later, after the helicopter landed, the doctors had all arrived, and the priest and our family were present, they started the procedure. There were no fewer than twenty people in that delivery room. Nurses, ICU doctors, specialists from every discipline. All but my wife's OB/GYN stood along the walls quietly, with their hands folded under their chins, praying.

At some point during the procedure, there was a sound from down below. My wife looked at me and asked me if it was the baby. I told her I didn't think so. Several minutes later, Allison was born. She screamed and cried like no baby has ever cried before. I could hear our families and the priest in the hallway jumping, cheering and celebrating. It was unreal what was happening around me. And my wife, when she heard that cry, turned her head to me and closed her eyes. One single tear rolled down her cheek, and she slept. She slept for over 36 hours. Not a coma and in no danger, she just needed the rest. Bottom line, moms just know things. It is senseless to try and argue with them.

Anyhow, that was thirteen years ago. I told you last night that she sees, hears, isn't retarded, etc. My only wish would be that each and every one of you would have the opportunity to talk to her. Just once. She is a remarkable person.

I thank God everyday for Allison. She has made me a better person. She will likely live a short life and that saddens me. But, she is here for a reason and she has touched hundreds of people's lives. Therefore, I can't be selfish about it. Instead, I focus on the fact that God thought enough of me and my wife to give her to us. We have been blessed with an angel on Earth.

So, yes, miracles do happen. Take a look around and you will likely see them everyday. Most of the time we are too busy to notice, but, often, there is a miracle staring you in the face. Take a minute and pay attention. Don't judge too quickly. Give the benefit of the doubt. That person in front of you that is moving too slowly or can't seem to get something right might just be Allison. She wasn't even supposed to be here.

And now...I'm crying again...


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